In the same way it now seems surreal that the tabloids are going after celebrity children as their latest obsession, it is also strange that it is now the norm to discuss a film’s script, as if reading a script is any indication of how well a film will succeed or fail. As we learned last year with Charlie Wilson’s War, script-to-screen can be a long and winding road. Actors, directors, producers bring much to the table. The written word is, well, only part of the whole picture. This is why it seems slightly odd to me that several sites are actually reviewing W, including Slate (via Cinematical).
It’s a good thing that Josh Brolin will reading these lines. Brolin was one of 2007’s breakout stars and he’ll be right at home doing a Texas drawl. But will they lighten his hair a la Colin Farrell in Alexander and thus ruin the entire film in one fell swoop (the camp pleasures of Alexander notwithstanding)? Here is a bit from the Slate review:
Pages 14-16: Before Laura is in the picture, W. dates Judy, “a blonde, curvaceous Texas cowgirl.” Judy needs a lot of reassurance: “How many times do I have to tell you, you’re my gal. I’m as happy as a rabbit in a carrot patch with you,” insists W. at a Texas bar.
And another part:
The Most Powerful Figure in the World
Page 1: Ever wonder how W. and company came up with the phrase “axis of evil”? Maybe it went something like this:
Chief Speech Writer: “Axis of hatred?” I don’t know. Something about it ‚Ķ just misses.
Rove: Well, then what about “Axis of the unbearably odious?”
Bush: Don’t get cute, Turdblossom. This is serious.
Chief Speechwriter: What about ‚Ķ “Axis of Evil?”
Bush: “Axis of Evil.” I like the ring of that. That’s it.
You know, I would knock this project, but you know what bitches?
Leftie Oliver Stone once made a movie called NIXON, about that ideological generation’s #1 enemy of the late 60s/early 70s, but you know what?
Stone painted a sympathetic portrayal, if not totally forgiving, about a tragic man that had the goods to be one of our greatest Presidents…and pissed it away because of his paranoia and egomania.
Really, a memorable scene is when you have Nixon pull off what Kennedy/Johnson couldn’t do, which was to gain a peace treaty for Vietnam without losing face, and he boldly announces this work of his at a press conference…
…only for the press corps not caring, and only wanted to ask questions about Watergate.
Now I aint saying that W will be a good movie, it could be even more bland than WORLD TRADE CENTER, and be worse than ALEXANDER for all we know.
But the way that W script plays from the bits I’ve read of it….it could work. I mean who knows, we’ll have to wait and see.
Plus, its a former coke head making a movie about a former coke head. Think about it…;)
P.S. – Why this crying about the scriptwriting? Stone’s dialogue has always been like that, for better or for worse…and at worse, he’s simplisticly melodrama ala WALL STREET.
And that still was a pretty good picture.
That’s all I have to say (for now), my bitches.
Oh, it looks as though Ryan has already compared this to SNL.
Ah, well.
I had very little faith in this project to bring with, but now this is reading like a bad SNL sketch that runs 90 minutes too long.
This will be a disaster.
alynch, casting The Daily Show’s Rob Corddry as Ari Fleischer is right in line with the other caricatures. “Perfect” for poking fun at war criminals and their most pompous apologist. Heee-larious!
Like I said in another thread, why not turn the whole thing into a musical parody, cast Dame Edna as Barbara Bush — The Mother of All Bushes — and call it “Big Momma’s White House”!
(Stanley Tucci would make a far more believable Ari Fleischer — if Stone were interested in being serious-minded and less obsessed with stunt casting.)
Puh-lease, keep Philip Seymour Hoffman away from this project. I know his name has been mentioned as a good bet for Cheney. But as bad as this seems, lets let Phil keep his career intact.
Heh, skepticism aside I defy anyone to say that this is not perfect casting.
(Besides, “Axis of Evil” was coined by David Frum, not “chief speechwriter” Mike Gerson. Gerson wrote “Axis of Hatred.” Frum changed it to “Axis of Evil” — without the need to show Turdblossom being “cute.” The script gets the details wrong, and reads like bad SNL skit.)
“In one scene, Nixon is in drunken haze while holding his incriminating recordings when suddenly he’s startled by a hallucination of his long-dead mother.”
That’s not half bad, alynch, but the actual Oscar-nominated script is even better:
———
She turns and walks out. Nixon is turbulent, upset. He turns and suddenly sees the ghost of his young mother, HANNAH, sitting there in the shadows, staring at him.
He jumps. Those eyes of hers. Penetrating, gazing right through him.
HANNAH
What has changed in thee, Richard …
When thou were a boy …
NIXON
(blurts out)
No! Please! Don’t talk to me!
Anything … but don’t talk to me.
A SHARP CUT snaps us from the reverie, and Nixon is alone in his sitting room, the door closed, the VOICE on the tape droning. He downs pills with the Scotch.
———
That’s some fine writing (though still, you couldn’t pay me to sit through ‘Nixon’ twice.)
If you don’t judge a movie by its script, alynch, then congratulations! You might be a studio exec!
Besides, “I’m as happy as a rabbit in a carrot patch” sounds more like Dan Rather than George Bush. A complex thought like that, Bush would fuck it right up:
There’s a sayin’ down in Texas, maybe other places, but Texas I know I heard ’em sayin’ it down there, “Rabbit happy. He must be eatin’ carrots… There’s a carrot patch see, and this rabbit, he was in it. Happy as a carrot.” Don’t you get it?” Snickers to himself: Heh-heh.
I weep for what will remain of Josh Brolin’s career after this. I don’t even know if I should be laughing or crying at this point.
I’m still looking forward to it. I find judging a film by its script kind of silly. I find judging a film by other people’s abridged summaries of scripts that have since undergone two rewrites even sillier. Dialogue that sounds atrocious when singled out can end up working depending on the tone of the scene. Also, I find the “axis of evil” exchange funny, and according to most accounts, it did come to be in a way similar to that scene (i.e. a bunch of aides brainstorming).
For example, I find Nixon to be an absolute masterpiece. However, it probably would’ve seemed awful if someone had gotten hold of the script before the movie even began filming and wrote the following: “In one scene, Nixon is in drunken haze while holding his incriminating recordings when suddenly he’s startled by a hallucination of his long-dead mother.” However, in the finished film, the scene worked due to the tone of the scene, the performances, the lighting, editing, and every single other thing that can’t be gauged simply from the written word.
The “axis of evil” exchange is a real gagger, but it’s by far the worst of the excerpts on Slate. Still, this movie is probably gonna end up pretty campy.
Ugh. The dialogue. And turdblossom.
Unfortunately, Ryan, this is not an April Fool’s joke.
Great. All the sit-com wit of That’s My Bush combined with the Tiny Toon depth of Comedy Central’s Lil’ Bush.
Sorry, I’m still a little to sad and angry to think any of this is very funny. The time to ridicule Bush was 8 years ago.
Reading the script for Charlie Wilson’s War, my first impression was, “uh-oh.” On the flip side, reading the screenplay months in advance of seeing No Country for Old Men gave us confidence that “You can’t stop what’s coming” referred to inevitability of Oscar glory.
The script is the movie, and if this is the script then ‘W’ is destined to suck 20 exotic species of ass.
Those excerpts on Slate are thuddingly pathetic and groan-worthy. Are we sure this isn’t a belated and very cruel April Fool’s joke?
John Brolin can’t pull this off. Nobody could.
(Maybe Will Ferrell).
lol, this stuff makes me laugh as well.